Chastity: a thing that I would have found ridiculous a long time ago, especially seven years ago when Rhea and I first met. In fact, she brought the idea of orgasm denial to my attention a couple of years back and my immediate response was no. There was no way I would hand that control over to anyone, at all. She let it go, and we never talked about it again. That is, until March of this year.
She came across the topic and brought it to my attention once again. The difference this time, however, was that I had became more okay with handing over more control to her. I’m generally open to trying anything once, so I figured we’d give it a shot. I still wasn’t fully open to the idea of having my orgasms kept away from me for long periods of time, so the most we’d go was about two to four days. I decided that it was actually fun being horny throughout the day, and she surprised me with the added benefit of being teased and edged a lot.
Naturally, a chastity device eventually came into the picture. That took some time to work out and adjust to. I wouldn’t always want to lock up when it was time, and I didn’t initially like the feeling of something on my dick like that. Over time, I realized this was an opportunity to show my devotion to her and the feeling of it being there was just a subtle reminder of what we’re in. I slowly began to fall more into the right mindset. A few devices and decreased rate of orgasms later, we’ve settled into this. It started off bumpy, but we’ve found what works for us and what we like. Rhea is more comfortable and confident with her role as my keyholder, and I’m more settled into my place and realization that she’s the one in control of when, how, and if I get sexual pleasure and release. I’ve never had a single complaint about our sex, even before chastity, but I could never see myself losing the added dynamic that chastity has given us.
Chastity isn’t all that we enforced into our relationship. We also fully committed to having a female led relationship at the same time. To say that it was completely new isn’t exactly true. Rhea has always been the more dominant one and decision maker between us, and I’ve never had a problem with it. We never really talked about it or structured it until now though. We’ve made it clear that she’s the leader and I’m expected to listen and respect her and her final decision. We still discuss issues and she considers everything that I have to say, however, the final decision is up to her. I can be very impulsive, and not always the best at decision making, so I had no issue agreeing to this.
It’s still not always easy to let my pride and ego go to admit when I’m wrong. A lot of times this leads to my attitude getting out of hand, and there’s consequences to that. Whenever that happens, there’s a few things that she may have me do. The first thing, and rather obvious one, is loss of sexual play. She will also make me perform a submissive pose by kneeling for the amount of time that she feels is right to think about my actions and how I could have handled the situation better. She also sometimes instructs me to stand, facing the wall, without any distractions to reflect on what I did wrong. If my attitude is really out of hand, she will use a paddle on my ass. This helps bring me back to a submissive mindset and allows me to listen to her. While I’m not perfect, I do feel I’ve become a lot better since we’ve started this.
Both chastity and FLR, are things that takes dedication. We both understand this while we continue to work with each other and improve on it. I feel like we’ve made leaps and bounds since starting, but every day we’re still finding new things to do or change up a bit to make it even better. One thing we do know for sure is that we both love what it has added to our relationship and will love continuing this journey together.